You wake up, you feed your little munchkin, get dressed get your things packed into the car, possibly feed your little one again, and head to the Spectrum for a playdate. You are greeted by other moms with babies the same age as your own. You sit back and relax knowing you are in the comfort of a kinship of motherhood. You no longer count the hours until your husband gets home to help out or to just have an adult to talk to. You no longer wander the parks seeing other moms and their kids. thinking "should I say hi? Is that weird? maybe they dont want to make friends?"
So how does this happen? How do you make that leap from a lonely mama, overwhelmed and over tired, to finding those special bonds?
I joined OC Mommies 2 years ago this month (hard to believe!) My son was 4 months and while my whole family is here in the OC and my friends (I grew up here) I didnt have many friends with infants. I immediately jumped into the events, I signed up for everything, I chatted up every mommy I met. "Types" dont matter when you are a new mommy. you have "mommy hood" in common. Someone you would normally never be able to conversate with or relate to you now can relate to.. "who's your doctor? where did you deliver? how does your little one sleep? eat? latch? comfort?? best baby bargains? " etc. etc. etc. endless topics to chat about.
I tried to make it to 2 events per week and try and host 1-2 per month. Lunches, or fitness walks.
Over the last 2 years I have met so many wonderful mama's. and I am constantly trying to reach out to the "next generation" of mama's. But I have made so many close friends, girlfriends I can call up have a great conversation with, mama's that I can do Mom's Night Out with. Playdates, baby sitting exchanges and more.
It's inevitable that you will lose touch with some. Schedule changes, different interests etc. But by reaching out you will be rewarded with the friendships you seek.
If you have a bad experience dont give up! And please dont judge others. Maybe no one shows up to a playdate you were looking forward to, but maybe the little one was sick? or it was diaper blow out after diaper blow out? Maybe a mama is "rude" to you.. Maybe she is having a bad day, running off no sleep. Shake it off and dont take it personally, dive back in and know that you are NOT alone! We are all here looking for friendships.